My faith has changed. It has wavered, and evolved, and been compromised over and over again. That in itself can constitute an entire post. But for right now, let's talk about what we think God does.
We make a lot of guesses about the will of God, about His plan for us... But really, what if God's plan is to leave us to our own devices? Not to drop us hints, or send us gifts, or impose upon us challenges of strength and character, but to leave us alone? What if His "plan" has always been to make a world of fortune and misfortune occurring in equal randomness?
A lot of people, my mom especially, try to console me about recent events saying that God has a plan, or that everything happens for a reason. But isn't it entirely possible that not every bad thing that happens is lesson or test or challenge from God? And if we accept that, then not every good thing that happens is a gift from Him.
Yes, often times there's a silver lining that's easy to attribute to God. But other times, in the face of misfortune, it's much easier for me to accept that He is simply hands off than to rationalize why He chose to give us a particular tragedy.
It makes for a colder, more distant understanding of God.
But sometimes, for me, it makes more sense.
No comments:
Post a Comment